FEEDBACK: Self-Sabotage

My blog post 'Self Sabotage' went a week without comments, until Bruce Wayne Brady left some feedback, perhaps explaining why. 

Bruce Wrote: I've read this post 3 times in the past few days. After reading it again and seeing a lack of comments, I had to say what I was afraid to. This post hit so close to home for me that I felt guily after reading it, like you'd reached into my personal memories and scolded me. I was embarrassed that I'd done all of these things. 

Then, I thought, you couldn't post this unless you knew what if felt like too. I realized that many of us read but few of us comment, because sometime we don't know what to say. Other times, like with this post, you've said it all.

I must ask you Kid, did you write this, (as it seems with all of your posts,) from personal experience? If so, thanks for sharing so much of yourself in your writing. I think that's why I connect to this blog. You seem to put a piece of yourself into the work, which gives it heart.

Now, excuse me. I have some barriers to break through.

My Response: Thanks for the very useful feedback! So often, when things I write are met with dead silence, I worry that I've missed the mark; or worse, that I've offended people or talked absolute nonsense. So it's great to get this feedback!

I did write this from personal experience. It's pretty much the only way I know how to write! It's a common thing for me to get an opportunity or a phone call that is essential and exciting, yet I shy away from it and want to find all the excuses. The things I write as 'inspiration' are as much for me as anyone. I just feel it's good to know we're all in a similar boat -- which is why it was so comforting to see your thoughtful response. 

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The 'Role' Of FILM DIRECTOR

I think everyone in the film industry has met directors who identify a little too heavily with the role. That's all a director is, a role, a function. People can get hypnotised by the role and become dictatorial or egotistical.

Let's be honest -- sometimes these directors get great results. But for me, the best directors are able to step in and out of the authoritative aspects of the role as and when necessary.

If a director is too strong, demanding, or Hitleristic, people suffer. The actors are less free, the crew are pressurized and the director himself is locked into a role. It's as if he's acting. Playing the role of director man.

Film directors are human beings too. They turn up to the film shoot crippled by family problems, headaches, insecurities. That's why the dictator style directing is so false, it oppresses the insecurity, the real life.

Directors have a vision. Sometimes the actors can't get there, sometimes the director of photography is adamant it should look different, sometimes you run out of daylight and everyone becomes an amateur again struggling to do anything to get the take.

There is a huge amount of psychology to directing. Are the actors feeling supported and valued? Do your crew respect you and believe in you? Great moments of artistic flow and magic are always balanced with moments of humble failure and confused insecurity.

Let's not forget: most films are terrible. Often the instincts of the director are flat out wrong. Sometimes it's a lack of talent, sometimes it's simply making a mistake in the room. You get asked "Should it be faster?", "Should the gun be in shot?" and you make a decision in the moment. You're a human being and sometimes you get it wrong.

Try as any filmmaker might, the fact remains that no director has total control. Films are living, breathing things. They're like the weather. You plan for sun but sometimes it pours. How can any director be in control when the secret to great art is so elusive?

Some of the best moments of cinema have been accidents, things that arrived in the moment. You have to be open to that. But you also have to know exactly what you want.

That's why practice is the key. In this day and age there is no excuse for upcoming directors to be sitting on their asses. Tarantino and Kevin Smith made it look like they just landed with a debut hit, but the truth is they both had previous projects which they stashed away.

Spielberg was making films at eight years old. That's a huge reason why he's one of the masters. But as we see, he doesn't always nail it. That's directing. That's art. Never stay too long with being discouraged.

The flip side is when you're precise and certain about something and no-one else gets it. The crew and cast doubt your judgement. Maybe you are certain of how to get the laugh in a scene, or how to have a chilling or tense moment. The job of the director is to catch these moments and nurture them into fruition. Sometimes; in fact, often, people will doubt your wisdom in the moment and be strong in resisting your direction.

These are usually the moments that make or break a film. If you're certain of something, if it's integral to your vision, insist on it. The director sees things others don't see. It's your job to confidently stride forth and bring it home. The best moments in my films are nearly always things that the actors resisted the most.

That's film directing.

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Come Live With Me (1941)

This film is absolutely delightful!

Illegal immigrant Johnny Jones (Hedy Lamarr) needs to get married for a visa. The man she loves is already married, so when she meets down on his luck Bill Smith (Jimmy Stewart), she offers to settle all his bills each week, in return for a marriage.

He accepts.

But then Bill begins falling in love with this mystery woman who comes by on a weekly basis. Unfortunately, her heart is with another man who happens to be a wealthy book publisher. 

Our hero Johnny Jones happens to be a struggling author. Inspired by his mysterious wife, he pens a great novel about their bizarre relationship. It's so good that the publishers get interested. 

Of course, when book publisher Barton Kendrick reads the story of a Viennese woman who has married a man for a Visa, it strikes a chord, it's too coincidental to be fiction.

Here's where it gets hilarious. The publisher, Barton, wants to meet this author who is clearly writing about his woman. Bill comes to the office, excited about the prospect of being published. One problem, they disagree on the ending. Bill wants a happy ending, whereas Barton thinks she should run off with the other guy. Barton's wife Diane (Verree Teasdale) watches them argue in the meeting, wondering why they're both so passionate about these characters.

Barton pays Bill an advance for the story; and then asks his wife for a divorce. He's going after his true love Johnny Jones.

But of course; now the poor author Bill has a big advance! So he goes to see Johnny and demands she take a trip with him. Barton had unwittingly played a part in his own demise.

And on it goes and various other things happen to take the film to its ending. I'll hold back taking you directly to the finishing line, just in case you decide to watch it, which I think you should.

Don't you just love old movies? Give me some black, some white, a Jimmy Stewart and a beauty like Hedy Lamarr and I'm the happiest guy in the world. 

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Tuesday Dialogue #2 - Joshua Lyman and Amy Gardner

Setting the scene: Joshua Lyman is Deputy Chief Of Staff in the Whitehouse. Amy Gardner is the Director of the Women's Leadership Coalition. Josh is good with politics, good with arguments. 

Being in a relationship with a woman is not a luxury he's allowed himself in a long time. He was able to ignore this problem until Amy Gardner came along. 

AMY

You owe me half a million dollars and a drink. 

JOSH

I paid for the drinks.

AMY

Alright, five hundred grand.

JOSH

What are you doing here?

AMY

I'm just hanging out. Why, do you live here?

JOSH

I do. I'm sorry I had to leave quickly before, I still can't tell you why.

AMY

Was it a matter of national security? 

JOSH

No. 

AMY

Would you tell me if it was a matter of national security?

JOSH

No.

AMY

Okay. You didn't talk to me much at school.

JOSH

You was having quite a lot of sex with Chris.

AMY

There were times I wasn't

JOSH

I studied a lot in school. I studied hard in high school, and at Harvard and in law school. My IQ doesn't break the bank and I wanted to do this, so I studied all the time. And -- I missed something, or it's like I skipped a year, Cause I never learned what you do after you think you like somebody, what you do next. And everyone did learn, a lot of other people anyway. I didn't walk out tonight. When my phone rings at eleven o'clock it's important. Not important to me, important-- and I'm not puffing myself so you that you're--

AMY

You know what? Maybe not so much for you with the talking. 

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New Logo / Banner

Here is the newly designed logo for Kid In The Front Row. Many of you have asked in the past for a banner so that you can link to my site. If you want to do that, please use this image. I hope you like it.

You may also have noticed a modified header at the top of the blog, which I'm extremely happy with! Credit goes to my wonderful friend Elena.

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