Saturday 9 October 2010

Postcard From 13, When I Could Do Anything

"Your favorite movie is your favorite movie because it's your favorite movie. It is better than the movie that you just thought up - by virtue of the fact that it actually exists. Someone dared to make it. Before that, someone dared to write it. And as you count up the times you chickened out of writing a film, as you count up all the scattered 3-pages of notes that pop up in random corners of your home --- the realization dawns; the ugly voice in your head telling you that you suck is COMPLETELY RIGHT; up until the point you ignore him, or at least send him out for groceries and get on with writing. At some point, before the day you die; you may as well just at least attempt to write what is truly in your heart, or at least go in search of it. Because only then can you, or a producer, or anyone, do anything with it."

I never read my blogs after I've written them. But occasionally, randomly, for one reason or another, I stumble across one. And of course, most of the time I just wonder what the hell it was I was rambling on about. But this one, the one that I am quoting above, is one I really like -- and it sums up a lot of what I feel, and what I think goes on in the head of a writer. So, in case you missed it; you can read it HERE.

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The X-FACTOR Comes Alive!

Well, I was wrong. There was me thinking 'The X Factor' was just another bullshit reality show, peddling bullshit acts into the mainstream; convincing the UK that talent is a cool 'image' and the right branding and management. But it turns out I was wrong; this isn't just glorified karaoke; they have real talent!

Check out this incredible act from tonight's show. WOW!

When did this JOY and ENERGY disappear from music? When will we ever see this again? Why aren't we looking for THIS when we listen to modern music? When, as the general public, will we stop listening to the horseshit we're being fed by the 'music' industry?

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Friday 8 October 2010

Kid In The Front Row Online Screenwriting Competition 2010

It's time to do some writing! Yes, it means we have to get off Facebook, stop flicking through blogs, and stop telling everyone about the projects we're going to be writing soon; because instead, there is one to write NOW! It needs to be written now because:

The deadline is in two weeks.
If you win, it gets made! In fact, it gets made many times!

The winner of the KITFR 2010 Screenplay Competition will have their script made by everyone who enters the upcoming KITFR 2010 Directing Competition! So it's a great chance to see your writing not only made, but made many times! And it will be SOON! I hope that's a great incentive!

This competition is for writers of all levels. Whether you're a pro, or whether you're just starting out, or even if you're interested but worried because you've never written a script and don't speak English very well--- I want you ALL to give it a go. Be creative! Have some fun! Write something!

Here's the rules:

  • Your script must be no longer than FIVE pages (six including a cover page)
  • You must write in industry-standard format. If you don't know how to do that, please read this. If you're still confused, email me, and I'll help you with the formatting.
  • The DEADLINE for the competition is THURSDAY 21st OCTOBER 2010. No exceptions.
Those are the technical rules, here are the STORY RULES.

  • You must have these THREE characters: Margaret, Abdul and Regina.These are the ONLY characters you can have.
  • Your story takes place at the Headquarters of: 'The Equal Rights Committee.' The only locations (within the headquarters) are: Meeting Room, Kitchen, Secret Shelter.
  • You must include this line of dialogue somewhere in the script: "Who the hell is Mark Flamstein?"
If you have any questions, please put them in the comments. Also, feel free to take the banner and share the link on your blogs, websites, Facebook's, etc. I am genuinely excited to read each and every script that is sent to me!

The competition opens NOW!

Send Entries To:

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Thursday 7 October 2010

ELIZABETHTOWN - Greatly Terrible And Terribly Great

"Jerry Maguire" and "Almost Famous" were Cameron Crowe's masterpieces. They're perfect movies. Perfect; at least, if you like the Crowe touch; if that's your thing. Don't worry, I'm not forgetting "Say Anything" or "Fast Times At Ridgemont High" (which he wrote, but didn't direct..) but either way; these are his films; and the one thing you could say about Crowe, is that he was Crowe; which is basically Billy Wilder in color, with a little less wit but a little more romance.

And then there's "Elizabethtown," which is generally perceived as something that went wrong, which it did; or something that was terrible, which it wasn't. At least, not all of it. You see, with Elizabethtown; something strange happened - in that, we saw the very best and the very worst of Cameron Crowe. There are moments of true magic, and there are moments where it's almost cringe-worthy watching. The blame has mostly gone one of two ways. One way being "Orlando Bloom sucked," which he did, although; it wasn't really his fault, which we'll talk about soon --or-- that the script was too cheesy, which is wasn't - although I think maybe Crowe thought it was, and had a crisis of faith midway through shooting; which may explain how scattered the movie is.

So what is going on with this film? Strangely, at the beginning, the film is awful. It begins with an Orlando Bloom voice-over, which is one of the most unconvincing voice-over's in the history of cinema. Who knew Bloom could act so badly without a camera on? The way the scenes are directed and cut are also majorly problematic. The seamless feel of 'Maguire' and 'Famous' are gone, and we're left with clunky, awkward edits; which don't even flow continuity-wise. We feel like we're watching fifty different takes, cut together. That's true, probably; most films have multiple takes. But here it really shows.

Cameron Crowe made a film that he wanted to dedicate to his Father, and it was set in Elizabethtown. Weirdly, the film gets much better when we finally get to Elizabethtown. But up until that point, when it's set in Oregon, it's one big struggle. It's almost like, on some spiritual level; the film was at home in Elizabethtown but was alien everywhere else. It just doesn't feel like a real movie until twenty five minutes in. Naturally, this isn't very acceptable, and is a likely reason why most viewers lost faith.

Orlando Bloom is the wrong actor for the movie. I think this is a perfect example of bad casting. I feel sorry for Bloom (actually, not too sorry, he earns pretty well,) but this just isn't his kind of role. The screenplay was calling out for a Tom Hanks, or a Jack Lemmon, someone we believe in. Orlando Bloom, for all he tried, just didn't come across as a human being capable of any feeling. At least not as an actor. It's like that joke from "Friends" when Joey does terribly at an audition because he 'wasn't believable as a human-being.' Well, in Liztown; the character that's needed is like William Miller from "Almost Famous," he needs to be uncool, the blessed uncool. But with Bloom, you just can't buy it. He wouldn't get talking to a girl all through the night and then meeting her at sunrise, he wouldn't get the pure magic of a mix CD. The reason I feel sorry for him is that he really does try, he gives everything. And it probably is good acting, but it's not the right acting. It's not what a Cameron Crowe film needs.

But this is a film that's essentially about moments. It's about meeting someone as the sun rises when really you should be getting ready for work, it's about playing "Freebird" despite the fact you're about to get electrocuted, it's about running through a cemetery and feeling the joy of life, it's about taking solitary road trips, it's about breaking up with a girl when you're not even together and it's about learning to tap dance. THAT, is what Cameron Crowe is great at. He is the KWAN at that. And Crowe gets it right, a LOT in this picture, and he's never really gotten the credit for it. The all-night phone call scene is magic; and his use of Tom Petty's music, is magic; and the whole end sequence of the film is magic.

But overall, the film isn't magic. So what happened? A large part of it is that a film was made. And you can't force a film to be amazing. You just can't. "Elizabethtown" was a beautiful, moving, and funny screenplay. When I first read it some time in 2004 I absolutely fell in love, and was certain this would be the greatest movie of all time. It's what every Cameron Crowe fan hoped for. But how can a director live up to that pressure? The problem is: I think Cameron Crowe believed the hype. His genius at choosing perfect music for his movies had always been amazing to me. But I remember seeing him interviewed around the release of this movie; and he seemed almost smug, even lightly arrogant about how great he is with music, rather than humbled by it. And he seemed sure about himself, and the project, in a way that seemed different to how he was going back five years to when he made 'Almost Famous.' It shows when you watch the film. Some of the music fits almost *too well*, and it doesn't have the emotional impact that the director would have hoped.

When I read the screenplay, I was in love. When I first saw the film in the cinema, at the London Film Festival all those years back: I was angry. Angry for the first half of the film. I couldn't grasp Bloom's performance, or the fake sounding voice-over, or the awkward performances from Baldwin, Greer and Sarandon. But then after about thirty minutes or so, everything seemed to sink into place more, and I started to enjoy myself. By the end of the two hours, I felt true, pure, JOY. There really was MAGIC in the movie. It was inspiring, exciting, romantic and uplifting. If 'Jerry Maguire' and 'Almost Famous' are both a solid 9 out of 10, then 'Elizabethtown' is a solid 4 out of 10 yet also a solid 12 out of 10. It's everything and nothing, it's great and terrible, terrible and great. It's Crowe the artist, trying to live up to his other films; against the weight of a big-budget and a studio-endorsed movie star fresh out of that 'Pirates' thing.

Now, when I watch it; I find myself being forgiving. Underneath the many flaws, is Cameron Crowe's big-beating-heart. When he's on form, he is the epitome of a 'Kid In The Front Row,' when he's off form - he's still better than pretty much everyone else. When Cameron Crowe interviewed Billy Wilder, shortly before his death; Wilder said "Jack Lemmon was my everyman." That's one thing that Cameron Crowe hasn't found. Woody has his Keaton, Ephron has her Hanks, Capra had his Stewart - what Crowe needs is his everyman. And that's when he will truly become the legend that he very nearly is.

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Monday 4 October 2010

Wanna Go Down To Rick's Tonight?

Fancy going down to Rick's tonight?

We'll find a table, get a drink, and listen to the guy on the piano. This is unlike any place you've been to before. There's a man called Sam who'll play exactly what you want to hear. He'll make you dance, make you sing, make you cry. No-one plays them like he does.

I should warn you; there's going to be some gambling out back, and there's going to be some Nazi's milling about -- but somehow, it always feels welcome. When you've visited Rick's once, nowhere else really compares.

The great thing about this place is that you might be sitting there, thinking it's just some unimportant gin joint-- but before you know it, the most beautiful woman in the world walks in and your whole life changes in an instant.

You always thought, if you saw her again-- you'd be prepared. But when the love of your life walks in unexpectedly, and she always will if you're at Rick's, then be prepared to find things out about yourself.

The reason I love this place; is because everyone cares. Everyone knows who you are and even Sam knows your favorite song. He might be reluctant, but if you need it. He'll play it.

Ever loved a song so much that it caused you pain? Ever wanted to hear a song again even though, deep down, you knew that you'd never recover properly after hearing it? Maybe if you stick around at Rick's for long enough, he'll let you stay after closing-- and maybe Sam will do what he really shouldn't do - and play it, in that way that only Sam can.

I know you're not sure whether you should go there or not. Someone might be there who could break your heart all over again. Or maybe she'll love you too.

Take a chance. Let's go out tonight. Let's go to Rick's. Who's coming with me?

Care to share?