What Am I Looking For When I'm Casting?

I don't really know, is the answer. I'm just floating around-- looking at everyone whose applied to me, and I'm searching on casting sites, and I'm listening to recommendations--- but I don't have any rules, I don't have any specifics. Just an idea in my head, which actually isn't overbearing-- it's just a guide.

I'm looking to get a feeling, to be swept away in the belief that the person I am looking at could be the one. Especially when I'm casting a lead role in a big project. I don't care where you trained or what your trained in, I don't even really care what your experience is. I'm just looking for a sign-- a sign that you might get what I'm doing, a sign that you are not just looking for a job. Casting isn't placing someone in a role, it's finding the magic password, it's trying to make something spectacular for dinner when all the ingredients look like the same thing. I'm just looking for something to jump out at me.

And I don't mean jump out at me. Like, if an actor writes and over-friendly email or tries too hard to sound amazing, then it's immediately over, I've got no interest. I'm just looking for a human being, someone who could potentially get it. Get what I'm doing. The clues are everywhere-- they're in my job specs, they're in the way I approach people and they're in the way actors present themselves online.

If an actor is tweeting every four minutes about 'projects' and they're writing perfectly crafted emails to me telling me they're perfect for the role, that isn't it, that doesn't excite me. What excites me is the hope that I am not going to stumble across the perfect actor, but that I am going to stumble across my character. That I am going to see the person I wrote, standing right there in front of me.

It's impossible.

But you keep searching until you find it.

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The One Where A Tripod Plate Gives The Kid A Breakdown

Sometimes you really feel like you know yourself. You really have your life, and your mind, figured out. You've dealt with your personal problems, overcome confidence issues-- and life seems like one big bowl of sunshine; a universe full of love and opportunity. It's easy to feel like this when nothing is really happening, and when nothing in particular is going wrong. But then something drastic can happen; like a death, a huge bill, or a small tripod plate going missing.

For those of you that don't know -- a tripod plate is the thing that fixes your camera to the tripod. Okay, you probably all knew that. I have two of these plates, at home; yet they both decided to go missing, leaving me to go completely insane.

It all started last week some time when a guy I know rang me up to ask if I wanted a camera job, as he couldn't do it. My initial thought was "Will this stop me from sitting around watching The West Wing?" which of course it would, but then he mentioned how much I would get paid - so I accepted. Because as much as I ramble on about artistic integrity and the heart of movies, in reality I just want a huge wad of cash.

So I took the job and went back to watching The West Wing and then before you know it today arrives and I'm suddenly very aware that tomorrow I have the shoot. So I go find my equipment. Everything is fine. Apart from the Tripod Plate. Which is missing.

It was actually missing two weeks ago, when I offered to film an audition piece for an actress friend. She thought I was a bit insane when, in between the tripod and the camera I placed a big medical encyclopedia from 1967. Luckily this not only helped stabilize the camera but also enabled me to diagnose her with lumbago. Of course, going out on a professional shoot - it is less acceptable to balance equipment on a medical book, especially as I have a tendency to test people's knowledge of Onychogryphosis.

The plate was missing, but I figured it would be laying around, somewhere. I still believe it is laying around somewhere, probably chilling out and relaxing-- but after a brief, carefree look for it this morning, I suddenly began to go insane. WHERE THE HELL IS THE TRIPOD PLATE? I looked everywhere. Camera bags, in the garage where my old lighting gear is, in my room, in the fridge, in the toaster. Nowhere-- where the hell was it?

Maybe that friend who borrowed my tripod because he was filming a wedding has it? In fact, I was certain he had it. Even though, truthfully; I remember him returning the tripod and the plate, maybe he didn't? Or maybe he did but, when I turned away, stole it back from me. Why would somebody steal a tripod plate when they don't have a tripod or a camera? I don't know, but I was certain he stole it and was ready to phone him up and scream at him just as soon as I took the carpet up to search for the long lost Tripod Plate.

I looked in the same places, again and again. I then text the guy who got me the job to suggest my suddenly genius idea of doing it handheld. He called me back and told me to stop being insane and said "you really need a tripod."

I said "I have one."

And he said "you should use it."

So I said "I will."

And he said "so what's the problem with your tripod?"

And I said "there's no problem with the tripod."

So he said "Why are we having this conversation?"

And I said "because of a tripod plate."

So he said "You don't have one?"

And I said "Actually I have two."

So he asked "What is the problem?"

And I said "I don't know where they are."

I began to panic. What the hell would I do if I didn't find my Tripod Plate? I immediately formulated an emergency plan, but found it hard to concentrate as I took in another episode of The West Wing.

The point of this story, in case you haven't figured it out already; is never, ever, trust a tripod plate.

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Screenwriting Contest Finalists To Be Judged By GLEE Editor JOE LEONARD

Thank you to everyone who took part in the screenwriting competition, the deadline for which passed a few days ago. There were twenty-four entries, which is fantastic given the short deadline and the small readership of the blog.

Here's what's going to happen now; I'm going to spend time this week reading all of the entries, and then I will make a shortlist of the best screenplays. I will then work with JOE LEONARD to determine which is the winning screenplay. Joe is the writer/director of the fabulous feature film "HOW I GOT LOST" and is also an editor. He's edited numerous episodes of "GLEE" and was on the editorial department of the recent film "EAT PRAY LOVE." He is a great writer, has great creative instincts, and is the perfect judge for this competition.

We'll be back with more information soon! Meanwhile, thanks for all your entries! I can't wait to read them all.

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Bad Ideas

I've got a bad idea; let's meet up to discuss writing a script together, spend two weeks talking about it and then not do anything.

I've got an idea; let's say we're finally going to edit our showreels, demand the footage from all the people who have it and the leave it all under the bed for two years.

I've got an idea; let's take that contact at Universal that your Uncle put himself on the line for and then let's not bother calling them for seventeen months.

I've got an idea, let's call ourselves writers and not write a word in three months. Let's not complete a script in five years.

I've got an idea let's get a cast and crew to dedicate their time to a short film and then when it's shot let's not bother editing for two years and then when we finally finish it, let's hide it and think of a load of reasons why it will never be ready.

Here's a great idea, let's buy a load of inspirational industry books but not read them.

I've got an idea; let's take little trivial things like having to stay an extra hour at work or having to help the Grandparents carry their shopping home and let's use those things as excuses for not doing things for the rest of the day.

I've got an idea, let's get boyfriends and girlfriends who have no interest in creativity and then let's be surprised when we're no longer creating anything.

Here's a genius idea - let's tell someone we're really excited about the opportunity they have and then when they call let's not answer, and let's pretend that our phone wasn't working or that we'd accidently left it at home.

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The Event - WTF?

I began watching "THE EVENT," just because it was on TV. I don't normally do that; in fact, I don't watch anything on TV. I just watch box-sets about six years after everyone else. But the show was up on the screen and I was down on the sofa so I thought I might as well begin watching as the girl in it was kind of hot and also I was under the strange impression that this was a one off TV movie. So I sat and began watching.

A guy was on a plane going a bit crazy for no-reason and then there was a caption saying 'Eight Days Earlier' and the guy who was going crazy on the plane was now chilling out with the hot girl by the beach; they chatted for a bit, and then he dived in the water to save some girl who was drowning. And then it said 'Four Days Earlier.' Was this four days before the previous eight days; or four days before the original day, the day of days; which I can only assume was the day the dude went crazy on a plane - or some other day?

Anyway, suddenly the President got involved, but that was sixteen days before something; but was maybe four days after the hot girl's mother got shot either three minutes or three years after another one of her daughters got kidnapped for trying to rescue a small bike.

Meanwhile, some time went by and the crazy dude was not on a plane and not on a beach but it was six days since four days ago and three years ago he was in a hotel room looking for the hot girl who may have been kidnapped or may have popped out for a coffee. Then we cut to a commercial and came back sixteen days after three days before the four days five months ago when the daughter's Father became a pilot and then an alien stole the airplane. The End.

Can someone explain to me what the hell is going on? And is everyone okay? Do we even know what date it is? Does this blog even exist yet? Does Sarah Roemer (hot girl) wanna crash at my place until all this dies down?

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