Friday 25 March 2011

Things I Hate

Enough of the positive malarkey. Let's get down to the negative.

1. Cinema Staff During A Screening..

..who come in halfway through a movie and sit in front of you and start texting their friends. Not good.

2. Eat Pray Love

Fuckawful film which is like one big advert for white privilege. A rich, married, white American woman decides to do some 'soul-searching' after realising she doesn't love her husband anymore. She pisses off to a bunch of different countries where people are seemingly waiting around ready to be stereotypical of their nationalities.. i.e food loving Italians and Eastern spiritual gurus. Julia Roberts prances around the world picking up bits of wisdom that make her dull yet perfect American lifestyle more meaningful and profound (to her). Never has a film been so condescending, misled and, in many ways, offensive. Absolutely soulless.

3. The 'How can you not have seen...?' shitheads.

You know the ones I mean. The guys who love their piece of Romanian zombie bullshit from 1976 and try to make out you're a lesser person because you haven't seen it. "Oh come on, how can you not have seen it?" Like I give a shit.

4. Actors Who Leave Your Script On The Train.

Unbelievable. The actress gets to the audition and asks for another copy. "I'm sorry I left your script on the train," she says. That's great! Nothing I love more than giving away my passion project to a stranger on a train.

5. People who believe their own hype.

Because hype dies. One minute the newspaper says you're the next big star -or- you get a lead role in a TV show, the next minute you're tending bar. That's the reality. But there's nothing worse than someone who's only just put down the empty glasses who won't return calls or won't be polite because they think they've 'surpassed it.' These people suffer when the hype dies, because everyone remembers. It happens all the time. Don't believe your hype. It's meaningless.

Care to share?


  1. #2 - I was offended especially by the ending. She couldn't be happy without giving up her life for a man? Really?! Seriously? The man was the answer that she had been looking for. Stab me in the heart - it was a Disney ending just without the ball gown and tiara.

    I normally love your optimism and persistently positive outlook, but it is good to see you are human.

  2. Eat, Pray, Love, the movie- sounds just like the book. I couldn't even finish it.
    Wow Kid! A little digression here. It's alright-it's good for you.

  3. Me either on EPL. Wasn't interested in reading the book (after I already heard what it's about AND I get the "You HAVEN'T read it yet? You MUST!") and, even though I love Julia Roberts, won't be watching the movie.

  4. Tonja, I am indeed human and I forget how enjoyable this negative stuff is! Maybe I'll start an alternate blog.....

    Jayne, digressions are needed!

    Lucky, glad you're with me on this.

    Steph, can you recommend any Romanian films?

    Zarko, of course; very funny, I love Curb.

  5. I've never seen Curb Your Enthusiasm.

    What? You never seen...!!!

  6. FINALLY! I've been telling you to get in touch with your inner curmudgeon for ages now. Feels good, dunnit?

  7. it's a 1968 american zombie film <_<
    and as for Romanian? maybe you meant Strigoi, a 2009 vampire film? Or Romero the director of the zombie film?

    but seriously, how could you not of seen it? :P

  8. Ha! Get you!

    Great post, I always enjoy a good rant.

  9. YES! This is what I'm talking about, man! Too much optimism will just make you dizzy.

    As for 3, fuck yeah.

  10. what they said. great post dude, everyone needs a rant once in a while

  11. @Kid In The Front Row: Well, I liked "Weekend with My Mother" (2009) xD

  12. I am all for positivity but this post was great. I hope you enjoyed letting off steam as much as I enjoyed reading it.

  13. Hm, I'm guilty of #3. Have to work on that.

  14. Yes I am not sure if it was the Julia Roberts brand label stamped all over it...or the long holiday narrative journey plot that went nowhere. Its possible that they where Just reading... blabbing lines with no genuine feeling. The real objective of the journey was about reaching the pay cheque at the end.

    Have not read the book so can not compare both. It was disappointing and soulless as you said... It made me not want to even attempt reading the book.

    YES what is it with people answering phones in the cinema...TALKING....full blown conversations now days...!!! I have seen so much of I compare it to back when I was younger and cinemas used to be packed and everyone wanted to see the they would shut up !! and show each other respect... Where has cinema etiquette gone....?

  15. It is good to beable to come clean about thing you do not like, it takes nothing to say the world is perfect, but it is hard to acept that it is not and there are things you can not stand