I used to sit in this crate box thing in the garden and pretend it was a car. I used to sit in the car and pretend it was a spaceship. I was afraid the ice cream would melt. I was scared they'd pick me for the choir. I did not like even a single vegetable. I kicked a tiny little stone all the way to absolutely everywhere. I climbed things. I fell off things. I thought kicking her in the foot was a good way to impress her. I stood on my Grandfather's feet and he walked me around the room. I was only allowed to the end of the street but I went all the way as far as almost past the end of the street. I had the Ghostbusters backpack. I constantly wrote stories about spaceships. I gave up bike riding every time there was a puncture. I skated straight into a wall. I didn't share my chocolate with her because it was mine and she could get her own. I saw her sad-eyed reaction so I gave her all my chocolate and then she went off with another boy who had the same name as me. I hid in the ditch and pretended to save the world. I swung so high on the swing that I fell clear off. I stood right next to the swing which she swung straight into my finger. I had a fight with a giant bully and won. I played cricket in the garden. I ran around the big lake. I put my coat next to hers and it felt like love. I built a wooden model of a boat but only got as far as cutting a big piece of wood into a medium piece of wood. I asked for my ball back and they told me to go away. I climbed up onto the shed and found maybe twenty tennis balls. I was young.
Wednesday, 6 June 2012
When You're In The Moment
When you're engrossed in the movie; when the song gets you high; when the book has you screaming through the pages -- for the briefest of moments, you get to drop your identity.
Your personal history is irrelevant. Your broken heart; the money you owe; your deepest insecurity -- they're all gone and non-existent.
Great art lifts us above the self-definitions and outside of the boundaries which rule our everyday lives.
We get to dream. We get to be kids in the front row.
Tuesday, 5 June 2012
The Party
I always think I'm not invited.
I was on my way to a party a few days ago; and halfway through the journey my brain went into a panic.
I was convinced that I was invited by mistake. That maybe the text reminders were for someone else with the same name as me.
That kind of panic I can handle, because I've been doing it all my life. But then it got more insane.
I suddenly had a bigger worry ----- what if there is no party? What If I got it all wrong? What if I turn up, knock on the door; birthday card in hand --- and I got the wrong day? Or maybe there is a gathering but it's not a birthday..?
My brain couldn't cope. Complete anxiety.
I scrolled through all my text messages, desperate to see the word 'birthday'. It wasn't there.
WAS IT HER BIRTHDAY? WAS IT TODAY? WAS I INVITED?
I arrived at her place. I knocked on the door.
I heard some voices; it sounded party-like. A good sign.
And then it hit me. What if everybody hates me? What if they want to talk about my film work the whole time? What if they don't even mention my film work? What if they don't talk to me? What if I don't talk to them?
The panic reached fever pitch. I was about to walk into a house full of people who would see me give a birthday card to someone when it wasn't even her birthday. And then they would all hate me because somehow they all had access to my deepest insecurities and would use them all against me.
This is why I hate going to the party. I lose all rationality. I get scared.
I was on my way to a party a few days ago; and halfway through the journey my brain went into a panic.
I was convinced that I was invited by mistake. That maybe the text reminders were for someone else with the same name as me.
That kind of panic I can handle, because I've been doing it all my life. But then it got more insane.
I suddenly had a bigger worry ----- what if there is no party? What If I got it all wrong? What if I turn up, knock on the door; birthday card in hand --- and I got the wrong day? Or maybe there is a gathering but it's not a birthday..?
My brain couldn't cope. Complete anxiety.
I scrolled through all my text messages, desperate to see the word 'birthday'. It wasn't there.
WAS IT HER BIRTHDAY? WAS IT TODAY? WAS I INVITED?
I arrived at her place. I knocked on the door.
I heard some voices; it sounded party-like. A good sign.
And then it hit me. What if everybody hates me? What if they want to talk about my film work the whole time? What if they don't even mention my film work? What if they don't talk to me? What if I don't talk to them?
The panic reached fever pitch. I was about to walk into a house full of people who would see me give a birthday card to someone when it wasn't even her birthday. And then they would all hate me because somehow they all had access to my deepest insecurities and would use them all against me.
This is why I hate going to the party. I lose all rationality. I get scared.
Saturday, 2 June 2012
KITFR Screenwriting Program Begins Tomorrow
For one week, starting tomorrow; the following readers of the blog, all of whom are writers (although not all of them identify in this way... yet) will be taking part in the Kid In The Front Row ONE WEEK Screenwriting Program.
For one week, starting tomorrow; these six writers will be penning their own short-form screenplays -- with my assistance. The purpose, more than anything, is to get them writing. To get their visions to the point of completion. Will the scripts all be perfect? Probably not. Will they get made into movies? Who knows. That's not the point of this exercise.
The point of the screenwriting program is to get writers writing. At the end of the week; I will publish all six screenplays. If any of the writers don't complete their scripts by the deadline, Sunday 10th June, then I won't publish their scripts and won't take them seriously as writers again.
I will be on hand to assist them in any way I can. They may not need me. Or they may be stuck on a blank first page and need some motivation. Or maybe they'll need someone to brainstorm with; or they'll need help overcoming self-doubt. Who knows. Whatever it is; my plan and hope is to see six completed scripts, based on their own original ideas; all completed by next Sunday. They will retain full ownership, and credit, it's their babies --- I'm just sitting in the passenger seat, trying to egg them on.
Anthony Abatte, Texas.
Cheryl Beading, San Francisco, California.
Chad Brown, Studio City, California
Lesya Hearst, Ukraine.
Kim Nunley, Oakland, California.
Matt Zurcher, Pennsylvania.
For one week, starting tomorrow; these six writers will be penning their own short-form screenplays -- with my assistance. The purpose, more than anything, is to get them writing. To get their visions to the point of completion. Will the scripts all be perfect? Probably not. Will they get made into movies? Who knows. That's not the point of this exercise.
The point of the screenwriting program is to get writers writing. At the end of the week; I will publish all six screenplays. If any of the writers don't complete their scripts by the deadline, Sunday 10th June, then I won't publish their scripts and won't take them seriously as writers again.
I will be on hand to assist them in any way I can. They may not need me. Or they may be stuck on a blank first page and need some motivation. Or maybe they'll need someone to brainstorm with; or they'll need help overcoming self-doubt. Who knows. Whatever it is; my plan and hope is to see six completed scripts, based on their own original ideas; all completed by next Sunday. They will retain full ownership, and credit, it's their babies --- I'm just sitting in the passenger seat, trying to egg them on.
Thursday, 31 May 2012
Be a Part of the KITFR Screenwriting Program!
The deadline for entry is TOMORROW! This is a free opportunity to work with me to help get your short screenplay written in ONE WEEK! Apply HERE.
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