This Day In My Life Will Forever Be Recorded...

..in a CD I made.

I've done it all my life. Probably since I was about 8. Then, of course, it was tapes. When I got into my teens, I began labelling them by date. When I was 17 or so, I'd make CD's pretty much every day, because music is so powerful at that age.

Now I don't really have the time or patience to make myself a CD that often, but occasionally I do. Today, I had a weird day -- one of those days when you can't be productive and you're just annoying yourself, and every thought in your head is just stupid and annoying and going nowhere.

I didn't know what was going on, or what I was meant to do with myself -- until it hit me suddenly. I want to listen to some music.
So I did. Recorded is an 80 minute track of the songs I listened to.

A good mix tells a story; a far bigger and more personal story than is often achieved in more traditional forms. I guess it's because you get to cheat and use other people's art. Bob Dylan is always going to be a lot more profound than I am.

Not that I meant to be profound. I just listened to music.

But you soon realize, nobody just listens to music. Your tastes, your choices, your decisions; they all come in to it. Maybe not so much when you hit shuffle. But when you sit down for an hour and a half with the sole intention of indulging in music -- the personal nature of it is undeniable.

Do you want to hear it? An 80 minute mp3, which I'll upload somewhere for you to download, if you're interested. Who knows, you might find a new favourite song, or reconnect with a song that you let go of some years back. Chances are, you'll learn something about me too.

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A Part Of Me That I Just Found.

I used to make Tapes. I used to make CD's. I used to sit by the radio waiting for a great song to come on back when they used to play great songs on the radio. I used to make CD's. I said that already but I'm saying it again because it was such an important thing to me. When I made tapes, it meant sitting there and listening to ninety minutes of music as I recorded it to the cassette. When I was seventeen, I had this job in town - this horrible, depressing job; and the only way I could stomach it was to make myself tapes, every night, that I would listen to on the way to work, during my lunch break, and on my way home.

I have tapes and CD's scattered everywhere. In them they hold the memories of girls who have been and gone, friends who have moved on and away and loved ones cherished and lost. I've made tapes during hard times that beamed with joy and I've made CD's during great times that bleed with pain. I have my whole life as told by Springsteen, and Van Morrison, and The Spice Girls and Billy Preston and whoever else came by at the time. There are people who've stayed along for the ride (Bruce) and people who were there very briefly and often for the oddest reasons (The Spice Girls). They've come and gone, just like everything in life.

I guess it's a part of growing up where you don't find the time to make tapes and CD's. You see, when I make a CD with 80 minutes of track - it takes me 80 minutes. Whether using a CD Mixer or a programme on a PC; I would mix 80 minutes together continuously. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean 'mix' like a super talented DJ who matches beats and rhythms. I'm talking me; starting out thinking I'm in a Led Zeppelin mood, and three tracks later finding I'm in a Joni Mitchell mood, before pondering why the hell I'm in a Simply Red mood before finally realizing I'm in a Neil Young mood.

Music was everything to me. It was a great leveller- whatever is going on in my life was only half the story, the music told the rest. A Mix CD was like art-- like a setlist, like a movie. A lot of people don't like the same music as me, a lot of people don't have the patience to play a continuous mixed 80 minute track. But a lot of people did. I have a few close friends who I used to give CD's to regularly. They know more about me than most people.

Last night, I watched 'Almost Famous' - a film that was my favorite film until a few years ago when I started saying it was 'Cinema Paradiso' and 'The Apartment'. I think it may be 'Almost Famous' afterall. Regardless, the film was exactly what I needed. The music is what I needed. Tonight, my plan was to watch a film. That plan didn't happen - not one film in my collection interested me. Then it happened-- I realized, I really wanted to make a CD. So I did.

Would you like a copy? Email me your address; and I'll pop a copy in the post.

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